King Tuts - Death Bubba, Nuken, and hash plus bonus gifts (September 2018)
MOM Name: King Tuts
Overall rating: 8/10
Sign Up: I honestly don't remember anything about the sign-up process, or if I even had to give an ID, but the fact it was unremarkable enough to be forgotten so fast says enough on its own.
Ordering & Pricing: Ordering is done as normal through the website. It is very easy to navigate and the purchase process was, again, unremarkable. There is a decent selection of products available, with the main focus of their business seeming to be flower at the moment. They have 12 strains in stock right now, ranging from 129 to 229 dollars per ounce (though they usually have 99 dollar strains in stock). They also have several types of extract available (two shatters, a rosin, and a live resin), with most being quite affordable. If you're looking for edibles, you'll have to go elsewhere though, because they don't carry any. Not a huge deal for me personally, but be aware if that's an issue for you. Finally, they carry a selection of supplies that also function as the free gifts you get with most orders. If you buy an ounce, you get one free gift from the 9.95 tier, and if you buy two ounces, you get three from that tier or one from the 29.95 tier. The same also applies for buying 99 or 198 dollars worth of concentrate, though you can also get weed samples when buying concentrate if you'd prefer. I ordered during a special promotion and received a Pensimple grinder (retail value something like 70 dollars) as one of my free gifts, along with a blue hammer bubbler. I was also sent a free pack of Raw rolling papers.
Communication: Absolutely top notch. The owner is quick to respond to emails and when I had an issue with my order, he was very quick to fix it. They're also very active on this forum and I think I've seen them on the Discord as well.
Packaging: The packaging was excellent on both my original and my replacement package. In each case, the product came in a bubble mailer. This contained an opaque resealable bag which further contained a vacuum sealed bag with the product inside. The original shipment also contained the Pensimple, which was just in its manufacturer's packaging, and the bubbler, which was in its own separate bag. Both bags of flower that I received contained a Boveda pack.
Products: My initial order was for one ounce of Death Bubba and one ounce of hash, each costing 99 dollars. Note that shipping is not free at any price point at King Tuts, and instead costs 20 dollars flat.
Death Bubba (Indica-dominant Hybrid) - This strain came in the form of relatively small nugs of moderate firmness that smell strongly of herbs and spice. It works best in joints, I find, and it burns reasonably cleanly, though the ash is darker than I'd like. The effects are about what you'd expect from cannabis in this price range. It's not weak, but not ridiculously potent either. It chills me right out and I tend to smoke it mostly before I go to sleep, both because it's cheap and because it gets me in the mood for bed pretty fast. I wasn't blown away by this stuff, but I didn't think it was bad at all either.
Hash - This is where the initial order really fell apart for me. This stuff was genuinely the worst cannabis product I've had in my entire life. I can't emphasize enough how much I hated it. It tasted and smelled like burnt hair. It gave off black smoke when lit on fire. It was crackling and giving off tiny sparks as it burned. It was horrifying and I felt pretty ripped off because I knew I wasn't smoking another hit of the ounce block I purchased. To be completely clear, they stopped selling this stuff very quickly (presumably after receiving various complaints) and it hasn't been on their site for a while now.
After testing these products, I shot off an email describing my experiences. To their credit, they got back to me very quickly and immediately asked how I'd like them to make it right. I asked for an ounce of the 99 dollar Nuken that was available at the time as a replacement and they were totally cool with sending it. I received it in short order and set to work testing it out.
Nuken (Indica-dominant Hybrid) - This stuff impressed the hell out of me and single-handedly saved the order. It is some seriously excellent cannabis for a 99 dollar ounce. The nugs are tight, beefy, and a real joy to look at in my opinion. I find the smell to be fairly similar to the Death Bubba, but with a bit more sweetness. It burns remarkably clean, producing white ash every time. It is noticeably more potent than the Death Bubba and also a bit less sedating, though it's still an indica and I'm not exactly feeling like running a marathon after a joint or two of the stuff. This is very high quality cannabis for a 99 dollar ounce and I'm very satisfied with it.
I'll also review the accessories I was sent. To be clear, none of my complaints about the Pensimple reflect on King Tuts at all. The owner was very clear that he had only bought eight to give away and hadn't tested it at all beforehand, so I went into it knowing that there might well be flaws (not that it really mattered anyway, since it was free). I'm just reviewing it for anyone else who might consider buying one.
Pensimple grinder - I have seriously mixed opinions on this thing. For starters, the price is obscene relative to its performance. I can't possibly overstate how ripped off I'd feel if I'd actually bought it at retail price, instead of getting it for free. The idea is supposed to be that you grind the weed using the built-in grinder, let the ground weed sit in a holding chamber, then hold a button to dispense it on-demand with a little motorized mechanism. In reality, this thing is useless for that purpose because the built-in grinder doesn't get the weed fine enough to actually dispense. It's such a massive and obvious flaw that it's amazing the manufacturer even has the balls to market the grind-and-dispense function as the primary usage of the product. You can assemble the grinder portion on its own to use as a sort of on-demand grinder (almost like a pepper mill) but I prefer a finer grind so I don't ever see myself using that function.
With all that said, I have found a place for the Pensimple in my stoner tool collection, and that's due to the third function. See, you can pull out the grinder part in order to basically create a big pre-ground weed dispenser that holds something like a half-quad and dispenses it at the touch of a button. It comes with a funnel so that you can easily dump your ground weed in there, and that stuff should be more than fine enough to be dispensed by the Pensimple's mechanism if you're using a standard grinder. Since I got the device, any time I want to smoke a different strain but still have cannabis in my grinder, I've just tossed the leftovers in the Pensimple. When I'm lazy, don't really care what I'm blazing, and just want a bowl quickly, I grab the Pensimple, dispense a bowl of random mixed weed, and I'm good to go. On top of that, it's super portable due to the form factor, so I could easily see myself using it as an on-the-go cannabis container for blazing while I'm out and about. If I'm walking down the street with a pipe (legal where I live), packing a quick bowl with the Pensimple is going to be way easier than fumbling around with a standard grinder, so I'm looking forward to using it for those purposes. All in all: I'm happy that I got the Pensimple for free, but I'd never advise anybody to spend the money on one unless it's at a truly ridiculous discount. Even then, keep in mind that it's really only useful as a portable weed dispenser, with the grinder function being pretty useless (unless you use it pepper mill-style, and then only if you like a really rough grind).
Blue hammer bubbler - This is a very cheaply made, very simple hammer bubbler. The glass is pretty thin, but not quite so thin that it'll break with the slightest tap, and it's been molded very poorly, to the point where it doesn't stand up properly and you have to balance it if you're not holding it. That said, it hits very well for such a cheap piece of China glass and I've been smoking it fairly often since I got it. I foresee it becoming a travel piece, since it's pretty portable and it doesn't matter if it gets broken.
Incentive for Customers: Nothing consistent, but they do have promos on a regular basis.
Incentive for Review: None, though the owner did request that I review my order. That said, I review all my orders anyway so I'd have done it regardless.
Conclusion: My experience with King Tuts got off to a rocky start. However, I walked away extremely satisfied with their customer service and their willingness to make things right without hesitation. The hash was awful, but the other cannabis I received ranged from good to excellent. I didn't feel like I overpaid for the Death Bubba and if anything, I feel like I underpaid for the Nuken (well, it was a replacement, but it cost the same as the hash so I basically bought it). The free gifts are a really nice touch that sets them apart from other MOMs and while I'm not used to paying for shipping, I don't mind as long as the price of the product is right. I decided that I can't give them higher than an eight out of ten for this order, given the hash situation, but I was happy enough with how it turned out in the end that I didn't feel right going lower either. I will definitely be ordering from King Tuts again in the future.
Photo: Death Bubba on the left, Nuken on the right.
